as a way to ease my distress over my first love affair with another man. It lasted just a short time, and we were young - but the impact of his loss shattered my heart. My first male love helped me fortify my self-confidence. He gave the word "gay" a classy face for me; and one consequence of being with him was learning to never regret taking time to dream on a starry night. As painful as it was, this was a sparkling chapter in my life.

My story is set in the last two years of the 1980s, when I was separating from my wife, trying to figure out who I was supposed to be. The book chronicles my time building a nest with this man. I thought, then, that I'd put as much into the relationship as I would have if it had been meant to last forever, while he hadn't; but I realize now that I was wrong. We both got lost in the vast cosmos of inexperience. So, there it is: an honest account of one of my life's milestones, fleshed out with plenty of hot man-on-man sex, work-related dramas, my adventures as a male stripper, and the trials of a first relationship. I hope you enjoy reading it as much as I enjoyed living and writing it.

REICHEN A. LEHMKUHL
Winner of The Amazing Race 4 & author of “Here's What We'll Say”

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